Thursday, 1st January 2004
Omg I had the BEST time last night! We arrived a little later than usual because Grace threw up in the car so we had to pull over on the freeway so mum could clean her up. It smelt so gross; we had to wind down the windows and go to a servo and get a Magic Tree. I have no idea why she does it. She throws up like, all the time. Especially when mum isn’t home. She just cries and cries and throws up and cries some more. It gets so annoying. Maybe all toddlers are like that. And if they are… well, I do not want to have one. I don’t think I could deal with cleaning up vomit on a daily basis.
Anyway, we got to the party, said our ‘hello’s’ to everyone and sat out the back near the buffet table. There was sooooo much food; I’m not exaggerating when I say it could have fed a whole army. That’s one of the best things about mum being Filipino; there is always a mountain of delicious food at any gathering. I don’t think I have ever gone hungry, and there are always leftovers to take home and eat the next day. Especially sweets. Oh God, they LOVE sweets.
Fortunately for me, Steph was grabbing some food so I didn’t have to go and find her (she can be difficult to find; she’s really, really good at disappearing), so I ditched my parents to go hang out with her. We listened to music in her room for a bit, then there was a knock at the door. Cameron, Lewis and Bryce walked in. I hadn’t seen them in a while so I was shocked to see how much they had grown. Cameron and Lewis are brothers, and Bryce is their younger cousin. I’m not sure what I’d classify them as… I guess, family friends? Steph and I have known them for ages, but Steph sees them a lot more than me.
And it’s all because mum doesn’t like Lewis.
She thinks Lewis is a troublemaker so we only see their family if we get invited to the same parties. Mum would hit the roof if I saw Lewis by himself. Not that I would. Eww. I mean, it’s pretty obvious he has a crush on Steph. I’m not so sure why though. She’s not exactly a guy magnet. She can be a bit stand-offish, and her appearance tends to stop people from talking to her. She has a head full of dreadlocks, and dresses like a 16-year-old Emo. You know, dark eyeliner, long black jackets and tie up boots. And Lewis? Well, Lewis dresses like Ali G, minus the glasses and beanie. So yeah, excuse me for not seeing why he’s attracted to her.
I prefer to talk to Cameron anyway. He’s just started uni but even though he is way older than me, we have similar tastes in music, and he actually listens to what I have to say. We’ve had some really good convo’s in the past; he actually thinks I’m mature for my age! Pretty cool huh?! And nooooo, I would never even consider going out with him. A 4 year age gap is way too old! That’s gross as.
So yeah we just hung out in Steph’s room until mum burst in, telling us we had to have dinner. Then she gave Lewis this dirty look and then told off Steph and I because we had boys in her room with the door closed. OMG it was so embarrassing! She has like, NO boundaries. This isn’t the olden days! I felt bad because afterwards Lewis actually asked me if my mum likes him. I freaked and just said that she just doesn’t know him very well. Which is true… but I couldn’t tell him the truth, he’d probably get real mad and stop talking to me or something.
I didn’t say much while we were eating dinner in the front yard because:
1) I was so embarrassed,
2) I was starving and,
3) Steph’s friends showed up.
There was about 4 of them, and only 1 was kinda cute. But he was taken. Damnit! I was a bit disappointed – I felt like I had dressed up for nothing! But they were nice enough; they had a lot of inside jokes that I didn’t really understand (I could tell Cameron, Lewis and Bryce didn’t get it either so it made me feel a bit better that I wasn’t the only one), so I felt a little uncomfortable at first, but then we decided to play Spotlight!
Spotlight was pretty fun because we are pretty much all around the same age. Younger kids make it real hard to find a good hiding spot… and they get scared in dark places. Plus, they cheat. So yeah, we had the whole street to play in, but Steph seemed to find me every round. She just knows me too well.
Her friends eventually got bored of playing Spotlight, so we all walked down to the park. Cameron decided half way there that he wanted to go back to the party with Bryce. He seemed a little pissed off so the only thing I could think of was that he didn’t want his cousin out on the streets. It’s a fair call. I mean, he’s only like 12 or something. I think Lewis wanted to go back to the party too but he was watching Steph like a hawk. Seriously, he should just ask her out already. Next time I see Steph, I’ll have to ask her about him.
The park was deserted, so we just mucked around. One of the guys had a skateboard so he was trying to do all these grinds on the playground railing. He stacked it heaps! I was like in the middle of a laughing fit when my mobile started ringing. I swear, I freaked.
It was mum.
I should have picked up but I just knew she was going to embarrass me again, so I put it on silent while it rung out. Then… I panicked. I was so para that mum was going to come down and get me, so I told Steph we had to go back. And for once, she actually listened to me. I guess she didn’t want to be embarrassed either. Lewis was pretty happy to leave; he looked so bored. He barely spoke a word to any of us; he was texting most of the time. And staring at Steph.
We walked into the backyard and everyone was either dancing, gossiping or drunk. I’m actually surprised Steph and her friends didn’t drink anything alcoholic the whole night; they seem like the type of people that would. I couldn’t see mum anywhere, but dad came up to me and kinda told me off for leaving the party. I was a bit pissed off, but at least he didn’t yell at me like mum does. He used mum’s phone to call me because mum had been in one of the bedrooms for most of the night, trying to calm Grace down. I did feel a little bad, but like, what do you expect when you bring a toddler to a party? They get excited, then they get tired, then they get grumpy and then they become a nightmare.
I went to see mum and she had fallen asleep next to Grace on the bed. I didn’t want to disturb her so I shut the door quietly and went to freshen up.
OMG my eyeliner was soooo smudged! Actually, my makeup looked hell bad I couldn’t believe I looked like that in front of Steph and her friends! I managed to fix most of it just as Lewis walked into the bathroom. He gave me a funny look and asked me why I wore so much makeup. I got offended because I soooo do not. Like, I don’t wear foundation or blush. Just concealer, powder, eyeliner, mascara and lip gloss. That’s not much. And I told him that. Then he said that I didn’t need it! He said I was ‘prettier without it.’ OMG! I swear, my mouth hit the floor! I didn’t know how to respond so I said to him ‘as if you’d know, you’re not a girl’ and got out of there as fast as I could.
Like, what’s his game? It was really sweet of him to say that (it’s so not true though) but shouldn’t he be saying stuff like that to Steph? Maybe he’s a player? I’m a bit confused about it, I think I’ll talk to Britt about it when I see her next. So yeah, I hid in the toilet for a while, until I realised it was nearly midnight. I scrambled to find Steph and I found her… sitting on the roof! I can’t believe that her parents let her up there – with her friends! I managed to find a way up (she was not helpful at all) and one of her friends gave me a sparkler and party popper. Lewis and Cameron came up too, so we all sat there, counting down the seconds until the new year.
I think I had the biggest smile on my face when it struck midnight. I love sparklers – they are so cool. I was waving it around and singing ‘Auld Lang Syne’, along with everyone else on the ground, when I felt my phone go off in my pocket. Sooooo many New Year’s msgs! But one stood out the most.
It was from Joshua.
I think time stood still for a split second, because Cameron asked if I was ok. I said I was, but I wasn’t. I felt my heart beating faster and faster as I opened up his msg.
‘Happy New Year Berry. Have a good one X’
Even after all this time, Joshua still thinks about me! And he sent me a kiss!
And he called me Berry!
It was nice to hear the nickname he gave me when we were going out. But that was ages ago. I miss him. I feel so stupid for dumping him but it just got boring after a while. Just like my New Year’s resolution; I need to stick it out for more than 4 months. Well, I hope I get a chance to do that next this year. I wouldn’t mind getting back with Joshua, after all, he was my first serious crush…
The rest of the night after that came to an end pretty quickly. We left the party at about 12.30am and I was in bed by like 1.30am. I would have gone to bed sooner but I didn’t know what to write back to Joshua. I ended up sending the lamest response:
‘You too X :)’
I didn’t want to come across as hey-i-still-like-you-lets-get-back-together, so I thought I’d just keep it casual. He hasn’t responded yet. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not. I wonder if he even got my msg…
As for today, I had a huge sleep in, had lunch and watched TV all afternoon. I did some drawings but I stuffed them up. I’m not very good at it so it’s probably a good thing I practice. I just wanted a distraction because I am dying to talk about my guy news. But no one is responding! I have no idea why everyone is ignoring me.
Yup. My resolutions are not going so well so far. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.